Thursday, January 20, 2011

Envy...

Today, I found myself in the strangest position.  I found myself envious of someone who had nothing... well very little... but she had the one thing I wanted: to stay home and focus on raising her kids for a while.

Yup... I have a secure, interesting job where I meet various folks - some well known, others not so much - but I'm always learning from them.  I have a gorgeous home, and a loving man and the perfect child...  But she has the one thing that's weighing on my heart the most: the ability to be a stay-at-home mom for a while.  Or at least - the ideal plan - to work much fewer hours and spend real time - quality time with my child.

I've worked hard all of my life to develop a career, but now that I have this little person, I want to be with him.  And, lately my job has involved long, long hours, and limited quality time with my child.  It breaks my heart.

The corporate environment where I'm work values long hours.  Before I had the little man, I didn't mind this sort of thing.  I was often the first person in my office and the last to leave.  Now, I don't want to do it anymore. I just want to put in my hours and rush home to be with him. (and no... I'm no longer the first to arrive/last to leave... but I still put in an astronomical number of hours).

The only solution I can think of is to figure out a way to work fewer hours and get paid the same/more.  How cliche!  But, it's true.  It would be a great way to balance life and work.  I'm tired of living to work... Been there done that. I want to work to live.  Really live and enjoy life.  Is there something wrong with that?

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